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As Trump melts down, Breitbart goes full postal

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As most of you know, I put on my hazmat suit from time to time to visit Breitbart (which I fondly call BiteFart). This is part of my opposition research: I need to understand what the rightwing sickos are up to.

As their Fuehrer, Trump, continues to plunge in the polls, and evidence mounts of his criminality and utter unfitness for office, panic is spreading throughout the BiteFart ranks. You can tell they’re freaked out, because with every horror story about Trump, they revert even further into the sewer of debunked and boring old conspiracy theories.

Yes, at BiteFart, no rumor is too ridiculous to leave unturned, as long as it riles up anger among Republicans and distracts from Trump’s manifest crimes. When Trump is on the threshold of impeachment, and his own Republican Party is turning against him, there’s always—HILLARY CLINTON to bash. Indeed, you can make an exact correlation between bad news for Trump and the amount of Hillary hating at BiteFart.

And if it’s a slow news day on the Hillary front, no worries: Big Billy Barr is out there unearthing the real origins of the Mueller Probe! Yes, he’s bound and determined to discover secret, treasonous links between—what? The DNC and Ukraine? Australian intelligence services and the CIA in a nefarious plot to overthrow Trump? Barack and Ruth Bader Ginsburg? Who knows! Who cares! It’s all grist for the rightwing mill—anything to detract attention from the true catastrophe of this Trump regime and its adherents.

I’ll tell you another thing about BiteFart and the depths to which they will stoop to feed their rightwing swine: If there’s a single case of a black-skinned or brown-skinned person in America who committed a violent crime (or is alleged to), I guarantee you BiteFart will publish the story with lurid headlines. Black Man Involved in Gruesome Murder! Mexican Caught in Pedophile Ring! Never mind that on the same day a dozen white trash dudes in wife-beaters might have shot someone; you’d never know it from BiteFart.

Well, the editors at BiteFart are going to have their work increasingly cut out for them, as news on the Trump front continues to worsen for the Republican Party. They’re going to have to distract and obfuscate harder than ever—which means we can expect even more outrageous lies and insults, courtesy of white supremacists like Hannity and his ilk. That’s how they started—the rightwing—with smears, and that’s all they know how to do. They obviously can’t govern. They’re very adroit at tearing down legitimate (which is to say Democratic) government; but when they do assume power, they flail. What has Trump accomplished, except to appoint judges anointed by the Federalist Society, and pass a huge tax cut that went exclusively to the rich? His regime has been one unmitigated disaster, crowned now with the debacles of the Green Light to Turkey, the Quid Pro Quo to Ukraine, and the embarrassment (which Trump, under extreme pressure, has now tried to rescind) of holding the G7 at the Doral.

What a crowd. What a joke. This Republican Party is the worst nightmare to happen to America in my lifetime—and that includes the Vietnam War, the assassinations of the 1960s, and Nixon, who was our worst president before we were infected with Trump. These Republicans have made their pact with the devil—with Trump—and now they’re going straight to hell with him. We used to have a saying: “Good riddance to bad rubbish.” It’s still apt for our times.

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